Life was simple for Riya. She had a lovely time with her partner and two children. Raj was the kind of man she wanted to marry. She enjoyed his company because they were poles apart. Still, there was one thing that she missed now more than ever.

Riya wanted to go back to work again.

She had decided to quit her job before her wedding. While she wasn’t interested to spend all her time in travel, she also wondered about how she is going to manage a home. She took her time to learn things.

When a setback happens on the home front, she would feel a sharp pang inside her about quitting her job. The 4 walls were not enough for her to be herself. She missed everything about work. After giving birth to two kids, her time was occupied keeping them engaged.

She wasn’t sure about work anymore. It has been eight years now. How would she go back to work? She had no idea about what was trending now, also, she wasn’t sure about managing the timelines of the job.

When the discussion came up with Raj, he had already decided for her. This was something that made her feel too protected. She wanted to venture out, but he was always planning things for her. For once, she did not want that.

She wanted to go out, be on her own and do things herself. It has been almost 8 years since she ever did something all by herself. He politely left the place. She decided to go for a walk.

On her walk, she saw the old bakery. It was closed for a while now. Suddenly she decided to go inside and look. The place was empty, cold and looked miserable now. She did not want to see this place to be like this anymore. This place reminded her of everything she enjoyed there. The memories, the warmth of the bakery was still there in her.

She wanted to open her own bakery there. She had listed all the reasons she could to convince him to buy it for her. After all, she was asking him a loan. She would pay back. She ran back home and informed Raj about her decision.

Raj was stunned to hear that from her. He told her he wanted to visit the place with her. They took their kids and walked to the empty bakery. While she was mesmerized with the place, Raj gave the kids a folder. He asked them to give it to their mum.

The kids laughed and handed it to their mom. She was curious than ever. When she opened the folder, she found the place was already hers. This is what Raj had wanted to inform her before. Had he given it to her before, she would have not agreed to even check this place.

She thanked him as she hugged him. He was her biggest support through everything. Finally, she felt it was time for her to conquer her dream.

I am participating in Vineetha Dileep’s Fiction Monday. This is Edition 53. This is a piece of Fiction for the picture prompt. You can read my previous post here.

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“Brothers don’t necessarily have to say anything to each other – they can sit in a room and be together and just be completely comfortable with each other..”

This is a tale of two brothers, Ved and Prem. True to their names, Prem was kind and thoughtful, the most generous person who believed everyone. As good natured as he is, he always talked and resolved everything. Ved measured everyone and everything, a balance sheet in reality. Though smart, he was doubtful about everything.

They blindly liked each other like siblings do until the time when their unmatched opinions became the reasons for their long silence. Prem was already in deep debt, while Ved was constantly falling into troubling times. Something inside them started ticking frequently. They couldn’t stand each other in the same room.

Slowly, Ved started finding fault with Prem’s approach towards everything. Somewhere inside him, Ved strongly believed Prem was the root cause for every trouble. Even as Prem tried to convince Ved, they were not able to see the brighter side of things anymore.

Days passed into months and years, opinions and arguments were only getting worse. Ved had always reached out to Prem for every smallest thing. Prem missed it, it had never bothered him to help. He never said NO to anyone. Ved wanted to be independent, but felt Prem was holding him back. He understood that life must be lived on their own terms. He disconnected.

It took a few years for them to reconnect with each other. As always, Prem was the one to make a call to his brother. He was surprised when Ved agreed to meet him. He knew something had changed for the better.

When they finally met, it was just the two of them. They went for a long drive without talking with each other for a long time. After what looked like ages, they were again in their favourite spot, just completely comfortable with each other.

They had never been like this before. Tears welled their eyes when they finally hugged each other before they left. There was no struggle or fight to stay in each other’s life.

Ved realized that constant judgement and comparison had banished their relationship. He loved what they have now, he cherished it more than ever. He respected the choices they have made in their lives.

They still did not meet eye to eye on many points, but they learned to respect the other person’s decision. They shared a lot with each other and meant well for the other. While others still put on their comparison hat, they decided to not fall prey to it.

All the way long, they had needed just one thing in their life to make this moment happen – SPACE. When they managed to carve out their life in their own way, their newfound freedom, paved way for love and respect for each other.

I am participating in Vineetha Dileep’s Fiction Monday. This is Edition 51. This is a piece of Fiction for the prompt QUOTE. You can read my first entry for Vineetha’s 50th Edition here.

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But when I was contemplating about these minor and major road accidents the only thought that was constantly revolving in my mind was ‘Were they with their family after a happy outing/trip?’ ‘Did they ever know that this would be their trip straight to the gates of heaven/hell?’

Image Source: Google

WHY???

#Sad #Curious #Unanswered #MondayMusings

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Share a feeling or two with me,

Do you wonder you have no one to share your feelings with?
Do you wonder you will not be heard?
Do you wonder you will be looked down at?
Do you wonder if all that you think is normal?
Do you wonder if it will be a mistake?
Do you wonder if you will be called a failure?
Do you wonder if guilt will kill you?
Do you wonder if past mistakes and regrets are the reason for the present unchangeable life?
Do you wonder if regrets are the only ones left to hold on to?
Do you wonder you don’t understand worldly ways?

Appreciate life!
God will appreciate you!
When you know you are here for a purpose,
strive to know it first,
Believe it and work on it till your last breath! 🙂
You are the seed for the good things to come! 😀

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2012 was one of the best years with many ups and downs, every bit unexpected and extremely thrilling. I was surprised at how much I could enjoy with family and friends. That gave a snap at the end of the year for me.I was only taught being good to everyone is essential. Never once did I believe that there was a vulnerable person inside me waiting to play her role and she made her debut in 2013. It took me close to 8 months of 2013 to figure out that vulnerable part of me which opened up and made me accept myself.

Now I am so happy and ever heartily ready to welcome 2014 knowing myself a little better than yesterday!
🙂
Above everything else, Believing myself better than ever! 🙂

Dreams for 2014

One Aim  -To marry the person I love and share our lives together.
One Betterment  – Embrace Fears
One Change – Vent emotions; Do not bottle up
One Development/Desire – To write everyday
One behavior to  Eliminate – Negativity in me and around me
One thing to Forget – To expect from anyone
One Greater Good – Practice Anger
One Harmony – Love and Trust
One Idea – Saving Souls; Read more books
One Joyous Action – To Share and Care
One Kind Action – To Help anyone in need
One Learning to Implement- Patience;
One Motivation – To Keep Moving whatever happens; to believe in yourself.
One Nurturing Act – Join and dream along with Kids; Read books
One Optimistic Character to develop- Hope
One behavior of a Prominent Citizen – Help create awareness about Women Empowerment
One Quality to add – Acceptance of Self
One thing to Remember – You are always Loved

One Step at a Time – Backward – when ego rises and Forward – Openness

One Thought – Everyone will come and go, its only YOU who stays with yourself forever
One Unwavering Loyalty – To Hold on, To Stand by and To Believe.
One Value – Speak Less; Listen More
One Welcome Change – To Let go
One X to let go- No excuses

One Yogic Exercise – Yoga
One Zen Thought – You are born to be happy; Let no one say otherwise.

The reality! 🙂 I accept this now. 🙂

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01.05PM
Riya called her dad to know what’s really happening? All she heard was her father weeping asking her to start immediately. The most haunted words came from his mouth after that, ‘Your uncle is dead, my brother is dead.’ She started weeping, she asked him to take care and that she would start immediately. Riya told her team about the news and they asked her to leave and take care. They had asked a few questions, for which she did not have any answers. She just left.

She wasn’t crying till she told the word ‘dead’, what is that word doing to her? Once she was waiting for the lift, she was back to normal, questions started popping up. She was in her own world. She knew where she had to go, but she had no clue what was left for her to see. By the time she boarded the bus, she was in deep thoughts jotting down all that came to her mind. Writing was also a way of venting her thoughts. Suddenly the roads were crowded and she thought there was an accident. The conductor in the bus informed that there was an earthquake before sometime and tsunami alert was raised asking everybody to start early. She realized that Tsunami had already hit her family but she was still unaware of the after-effects that is yet to unfold.

2.00PM
She was very normal on the outside, but her insides were taking a toll on her. Her mind was working overtime to figure out how it happened and the constant question was Why now? She started writing down all that she thought that could make her come to normal and shut that mind-voice. A piece from what she wrote:

The last time my dad was in tears was when his mother died. Uncontrollable crying by dad is making  me think they’ve conveyed very less information to me. He is seeing what happened for real and is not able to say it in a sentence. That’s how broken he was. Mom had called and she had no words to say other than ask me Have I started? The loss for her was as Big as my dad’s. The only person who has been more like a brother to her is dead. The biggest support in the family is lying down like a stone. He always had the knack to ease this family with his laughter. 

I always knew he liked my sister more than me. I used to ask him repeatedly, who was his favorite? He answered that with a smile every time, You too dear girl. I would look at him and say, you’re mean. My aunt would laugh and say you’re my favorite. I knew that was true to an extent though she loved my sister more. I never took this to heart but I loved asking him just to see that perplexed reaction on his face which looked more child-like on a 55+ man. I wonder who will be able to answer that without throwing an angry look ever again.

It took her close to 3 hours to reach with traffic in every corner.As she entered the house she could realize that the roles were being shifted. She knew she had to answer all the now child-like adults with extra care. They have become fragile. She was confronted with dejected faces waiting for the words, ‘He is alive‘ more than ‘Everything will be alright’. But she dint have the heart to say it to them for she did not really know what exactly happened. She saw her aunt with the sindoor on her forehead. She knew that was the last time she would be seeing that. That big red sindoor which made her look more beautiful was a significance of a happy married life. They were one amongst the couples who you could see and believe happy couples and happy marriages still exists(existed).

5.30PM
She held her in her arms for sometime and sat there listening to her talking about how he took care of her before leaving her. She had personally not listened to her aunt share all this with her. It was time to listen to her stories. The companionship that every couple longs for, irrespective of the fact that they are surrounded by a 100 people is what the better half provides. Riya was only getting theoretically strong about companionship and she has met couples who did not just look great together but happy and bright too.She wished there would come a day when she meets someone like that. Now she knew that even after 25+ years of wedded life, memories were the only ones that she could take with her. Being reminded of the person we love in every thing we shared and embracing it as another memory into our minds seals the love in a much better way.

She called her cousin to know their whereabouts and what time they’ll bring him to the house. She was shocked to hear the real news.

To be continued..

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W for Water

There might come a time when the forthcoming generations might learn W for Water.

Over the years the themes have changed but has our minds?
I was curious to check the history of World Water Day and the themes it had shared over the years.
Sharing themes from its origin here and associating it with a few pointers my family has taught me over the years.

1994: Caring for our Water Resources is Everybody’s Business

  Way back in the 90’s my family members woke up early to pump water. I woke up to the sound of the hand pump on most days. That was my cock-a-doodle-doo. My parents and the other elders in the family mostly finish the chores by the time my cousins and I get out of bed. Still there were days when dad used to wake me early to help pump water! J  To get me out of bed was the most tedious never mind help pump water. I was not an avid television viewer then to know about the water campaigns. But these were lessons learnt from family.

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When you get into the bus and before you could think about anything you doze away because you were tired crying all afternoon,
When you are woken up by him and being asked,’How are you now?’,
When all you could ever say was,’You disturbed my sleep’ but actually you are happy that he finally called you in spite of not saying anything in the afternoon,
He: ‘I am sorry, continue’,
Me:’Is this what you called for?’,
He:’I am bored and you are busy, so planning to watch a movie’,
Me:’Go to beach and sit or go to a temple’ and you never knew why you said the second option, when you really want to go to the temple now but you dont tell him that,
He:’Are you coming?’,
Me:’I dont think so, its already late’,
He:’I will drop you’,
Me:I never said I am coming with you!’,
He:’Fine, let me know when you reach’,
Me:’Ok,get ready,will be there in an hour’
When you realize that you are smiling as you cut the call,
When you sit back and start reading a book to not think about what happened just now,
When time and book has helped your mind and heart to relax,
When you manage to take an auto to the temple,
When you reach and call him to ask where he is and your eyes wander to find him nearby before he could see you,
When you hear his voice and you turn to find him and the eyes meet,
When you want that moment to extend, but you turn back to focus on the tasks in hand,
When you simply say a formal Hi,
When he looks at you and you know he is thinking too much only,
When you know there are walls purposely built around each other just to see who breaks the other’s first,
When you go in together and you know this is the place we really want to be in,
When you think he is going to spend close to an hour with you finally and look at him and he says, looks like its crowded and you will stand in the queue, so I will leave now, came to see you only,
When you really want to tell,’Stand with me’, but you say,’OK, Bye’,
When he waves back and smiles and walks away from you,
When it has still not hit you that he has left,
When you finally muster up the courage and ask, ‘Have you started?’,
When you hear,’No,what’s it?’,
When you finally say,’Come back, it wont take more than half an hour’ and you wait for him to say Ok,
When he asks,’Are you ok?’ and you say,’Just come’ and he says,’OK’,
When you are still in the long queue knowing he wont stand next to you but that doesnt look big coz he is around and that’s enough,
When you look up expecting him not to be there but see that he is smiling and walking towards you and you’re smiling back with your eyes twinkling, settling both only to find the walls being broken by that lively smile,
When its almost your turn to place the garlands and you see a teardrop running down your cheeks telling god, this is what I asked for and I am not at all guilty, Read through me, you know what I want,
When you walk back to get the prasad and ask him, ‘Dint you take prasad so long?’,
When he tells you,’I was waiting for you’,
When both walk with the prasad and finally start talking like nothing ever happened,
When both talk and laugh like always,
When both sit together in the temple for sometime and continue talking,
When both walk out and know its time to leave but have that longing to hang on for some more time,
When he again asked, ‘You want me to drop you?’,
When you say,’No, I’ll start now, it will be fine’,
When he says,’I will walk with you till the bus stand’,
When you say,’Are you mad? Go home, I can take care’ but you really want him to walk with you and all he ever sees for an answer are your eyes and not those words and he comes along,
When we are about to cross the road he’s constantly making you laugh,but you manage a smirk and say,’Very funny’,
When you are in the bus stand really expecting the bus to be there and there is every bus that you dont need,
And you manage to sit on the bench in the bus stand and talk again,
And everytime a bus comes now voice in the mind started saying,’Let it not be mine’,
And yes it continued for some more time only to realize that there were not many people around too,
And I managed to say, i’ll take an auto,
He said, Ok do what you like,
I said, Ok, I will think you as my driver, drop me home!
The look on his face said it all! 🙂

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