JAYANTHY'S FREE SPACE

I read. I admire. I love. I write. I laugh. I live! I love to think loud and the reflections of my mind are in my blog!

August Gratitude List

This month has been a roller-coaster ride. I have pulled myself to sit down and cherish the moments as this month closes. August was the beginning of many new journeys and the end of a few things too. I will list them all down and I have entered a new phase of parenting from this week. You will know more about it in this post. I will start with celebrations and then enter into phases that is helping me strengthen myself.

Ilakkiya:

What better celebration can I have than a 15 month old turning the house upside-down? Ilakkiya has started to run around and she has decided to burn down every single calorie. She has started to repeat single words and she loves imitating every single person. We also had our first fight this month. I am planning to write about it in a letter to her. She also did the regular phone conversation imitation using my phone with her cute babbles. She is slowly becoming daddy’s girl and trust me, I love it because I get the free time. Maybe, I will think differently as she grows. She is having an awesome week with her maternal grandparents and that’s the main reason I am writing this post early. Ilakkiya loves to dance and drum. She loves the guitar too. The most crucial change for me on her schedule is that her naps changed from 2 to 1. So more power to her to run down the house and more power to me to keep my calm!

Parenting:

Her 15 month vaccine happened early this week. I was surprised to see the little one crying only as the doctor inserted the injection in her thighs. Earlier, she used to cry immediately when I hold her hands, but this time she was curious in observing the madness around her and cried when she felt the pain. Weight gain is a issue in some kids. Even if they eat a elephant some kids will only look like an ant, maybe a big black ant! That’s all. I am bombarded with questions on her weight for almost 6 months now. So after being asked 1000 questions every single day for the last 5 to 6 months now about her weight gain issues, I have finally found out an answer for the most concerned outsiders. I am glad this brings more peace to me and I don’t really have to push my daughter anymore too. I just stick to plain simple truth. I just remind people that every child is different and chubiness doesn’t mean a child is healthy. Though I would love to see my child chubby too, I must remember none of us were chubby! Half of parenting falls into the category of answering unknowns about my child. I have a strong, healthy and sweet kiddo, this is all that matters to me!

Celebrations:

August is the month of celebrations. My sister completed a decade of her married life and she had come home this year. We had a wonderful time at our once-upon-a-time ancestral house, which is now reconstructed, but the good thing is my aunts stay there, so we still call it our grandma’s home. We had a nice lunch and chatted sometime. However, we sisters cherish this month more because we shopped, we had nice long conversations, laughed till our tummy ached and gossiped like we always do. Ilakkiya enjoyed with her aunts and grandmothers since all uncles are away at work.

T and I completed our second anniversary and this year it is all the more special. Last year, I was at mom’s since the baby was just 3 months old. This year we spent it together and it is more special because you will know it as you read on. (Well, don’t let your mind wander).

My in-laws completed their 41 years together and still they fight and talk again like they are newly married. At times, old couples are fun to watch. Wait till I post about my parents. Their wedding day is in 2 days and my sister and I are beyond excited about the celebrations. It is their 32nd and I love their silly fights. My sister and I always make the best audience. Well, we have learnt to become good audience now.

Sharing the wedding month with my parents and in-laws makes me realize how different we all are as couples and yet similar on many fronts.

Writing:

I loved sharing Much Love Monday stories on my blog this month. I wrote for 2 weeks and felt that’s the way I wanted to share. I wanted to share two stories a month going forward. I must make changes to the disclaimer I made for the same. I loved sharing those stories and I am also excited to ask about “How’s your Monday?” to many now. I feel better listening to their stories and this has opened a new dimension to the otherwise talkative me.

I also signed up for MyFriendAlexa campaign this month. This is my first season with them, I am excited as well as nervous about how it is going to be. With September filled with an array of festivals, I know it is going to be challenging. I watched one part of Blogchatter’s session on Facebook and I still have 3/4th to go, but that answered few of my questions. Especially the one on what I must be prepared for. So with Vasantha’s endearing words and always helping attitude, I know I will find my way next month.

Work:

I am a failure. I took a couple of projects and gave my best work and my best deal. They just turned up saying inaccurate work. I felt that I was being cheated instead of feeling like a failure. Yes, I trust my work and I know when I give my best. I have learned from my mistakes to always give the best work. I do just that. I called myself a failure because I just didn’t know to identify a fraudster from a genuine person. This month taught me an important lesson on the work front. I found what I love to work on and also my weaknesses. I love to write articles, edit and proofread them. I also found out that I sound desperate when I ask too much details instead of curious to know about the job. I am not sure how to work on it though. I need to know the details before I work, that’s how it works right?

Somehow in almost 3 years of freelancing, I found “Too many options, too little knowledge” being the base of many fraud happening in this field. No one is ready to get the complete details of the work before they take it in their hand and I am called silly for asking those details. Anyway, I feel I have grime all over me already that I need to bathe and start fresh.

Love & Relationships:

This! This is where I want to cry this month. I cried and cried for a week that I have no more tears. No, it is not something really serious. It is just that the Husband is on travel and I need to stay away from him. Though my logical mind clearly says, he is just out on work and this is what we wanted before and I have so much of work to finish here before I travel with him, I just couldn’t hold back my tears. We cried a little together and that made us feel better. Ilakkiya misses her father already, I never expected this. Still, she sees her father’s photo in our room and points him out to me. I decided a change of place might be good for both of us and came to Mom’s. We feel better and though as I type this, my eyes are filling up and my throat is blocked, I know I will eventually be okay.

I love my family for all the support and all that. Yes, both sides, actually all sides. It’s just the missing part that I cannot really bear. I don’t want him to miss out on her growing up. These are crucial years and I hope we travel soon. Though we decided this method to work on our commitments, we also decided to wait it out for 6 months. 180 days look better than 6 months, no? Anyway, I am glad to take up challenges on the personal front and with life in general to keep myself productive(seriously, not busy – this won’t get me anywhere) so I finish what I set out for and travel to set up our cocoon.

I know this will be the best challenge in my life to parent singlehandedly, also manage the house and myself. I just wish I find the courage, strength, patience and kindness to handle myself well, so I handle others in the same way.

Journal:

This is my everything. Though I didn’t journal much this month, I have started the 180 day project to journal just about everything, No judgement there. For once, I am okay to open up to my journal, to keep my sanity in check. I am okay to give a vent to my feelings and give them a way out when necessary. Life isn’t going to be a bed of roses anymore, probably it never was, now I just see it with eyes wide open. Thanks to my journal for bearing it all.

Books & Reading:

I was in tears when I finished “A man called Ove”. I haven’t reviewed a book it, because I am good at recommending them, but not reviewing them. I am bad at giving glimpses without the spoilers. However, this book is different. I could just come up only with this small poem as an ode to the author and Ove.

I laughed uncontrollably that people wondered what I read,
Tears rolled down my cheeks as I was nearing the end,
I was scared to bits when you fell on the snow that night,
I couldn’t deny that you were the only grumpy man I loved to know more about.

I am currently reading Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In for Graduates. I found a similar one in Shailaja’s recommends. My father has a great collection in his book shelves. He has always bought books, read them, recommended them to us and finally, left it in his shelves. I didn’t know about them earlier, but now I love each one of them. I have a big TBR list and told him I will take two or three and return them before I take the next list.

My August was awesome, even with all the glitches. I am looking forward to a Splendid September with Blogchatter and MyFriendAlexa campaign.

How was your August? I would love to know about it!

Linking with Vidya’s GratitudeCircleBlogHop

Priya

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Kalpana ManivannanUnknownParulJayanthy Recent comment authors
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Kalpana Manivannan
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It was a beautiful read Jayanthi. I think I will write my gratitude list too.

Unknown
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Thats an awesome post. Sometimes, it is important to wait and write down your memorable moments…cheers

Parul
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Hugs! Always remember that distance makes hearts grow fonder so these months away from your husband will bring you closer. I can understand it's not easy but trust me, the value that you have for each other will go up. With your little girl, you have your hands full. Must be fun watching her run around and imitate. Work – look for areas where you can improve and don't call yourself a failure. Every time we fail, we learn too. Wishing you a happy September. Take the time to enjoy and make the most of the time you have at… Read more »

Jayanthy
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Thanks a lot Parul for such encouraging me to try again. Sure that, I am hoping for the long distance relationship to be a tough one, but already I am seeing how much he has helped me around here and I am sure thankful for those little moments. llakkiya is keeping me grounded and too busy! 🙂 Happy September!!